I just know that somewhere a fangirl read this dialogue and thought to herself, 'ooh, sexual tension'

Backstory: For some reason, I have this ongoing mental game that I play when I'm bored. Basically, it's an insult war between Van and Raven. It keeps me amused, though sometimes I get odd looks for giggling randomly at inappropriate times. Sometimes it's pure insults, sometimes it's comments on actual Zoids dialogue. I used to think Van had a slight advantage over Raven, but recently Raven's been making a comback.

Raven: (snickers) Nice mullet, Van.
Van: Like youíre one to talk. Who cuts your hair? Shadow?

Raven: Oh, go buy a shirt.

Actual Dialogue
Raven: The next time we meet, one of us will die.
Van: (quickly) Not it!
Raven: (quickly) Not iódamn~!

Actual Dialogue
Raven: (sadly) There's no place like home...there's no place like home...
Van: Hey, Dorothy called.
Raven: Shut up.
Van: She wants her dialogue back.
Raven: Shut up.
Van: And her slippers.

Actual Dialogue
Van: ZEEEEKE!
Raven: Now who is the one stealing dialogue?
Van: You know, you don't own the copyright on screaming out an organoid's name.
Raven: Actually... (shows Van a piece of paper)
Van: You do own the copyright on screaming out an organoid's name. Well. I'll be darned.

Van: You were named for your hair color?
Raven: Yeah. So?
Van: So, conceivably, if you had red hair, you could be called "Robin?"
Raven: (muttering) And here I was thinking you didn't even know what "conceivably" meant.
Van: Quickly, Robin, to the batcave!
Raven: Well at least I'm not named after a family-sized vehicle!
Van: Awaaaaay~!

Actual Dialogue
Van: Dr. D said they're helping the Shield Liger revive, though I don't know what that means.
Raven: (continuing, as Van) Because I'm dumb as paint.
Van: Hey!
Raven: Come on! What exactly can't you understand? "Helping?" "Revive?" "Liger?" "The?"

Raven: Van, as a way to bury the hatchet, (quietly) in your back, I bought you this National Geographic. It has an article about Ligers in it.
Van: Wow, Raven. This is uncharacteristically nice. I'm already suspicious.
Raven: I've highlighted the important part.
Van: (reads) Hey! What do you mean all ligers are sterile?
Raven: (just smirks)

Van: So, you work for Prozen, huh? Smart move. I mean, really spiffy. For smartness, on a scale of one to ten, you get an eleven.
Raven: Shut up.
Van: No, really. Prozen must be a great boss. Sure, he may be a sadistic narcicistic completely deluded psychopath, but he's not all bad.
Raven: Shut. Up.
Van: I hear he gets great FM.

Actual Dialogue
Raven: The stars look amazing tonight.
Van: I always thought they looked like balls of gas burning billions of miles away.
Raven: Van, with you, everything's gas.

Actual Dialogue
Raven: I don't like Zoids.
Van: Whuh?
Raven: That's my motto.
Van: What's a motto?
Raven: Nothing. What's the motto with you? I'm still trying to figure that out.
[Can you tell who likes The Lion King?]


Main Page